Friday, July 20, 2007

Holy Guilty Pleasure, Batman!

So, last night, I'm hanging out, taking a little study break, sad that I don't have Internet in my apartment. (Don't mock, I's a po' bitch.) In my sadness, I decided to check out network TV.

Now, typically, I don't get below The Weather Channel on the TV dial, but I check down last night, kids. All the way down to channel 3. And, from there, I channel surfed slowly upwards, hoping to find something fun to watch for a little while I ate my dinner. (Name brand Raisin Bran, bitches. I was splurgin'. What? Don't talk shit. I ate an entire, huge Chipotle at 2pm & wasn't much hungry around dinner time.)

Anyway! So, I get to NBC, aaaaaall the way up at channel 13, and I saw it. And, it was beautiful. What did I see?

Victoria Beckham: Coming to America


Oh, ya fuck right, kids. Victoria Beckham has her own reality TV show and I watched the series premiere. And, it. Was. GLORIOUS.

She was every bit the primping, preening, dumb-shit celebrity you think she is. She went to get her driver's license and, when the DMV guy asked for her signature on a form, she said, "Do you mean, like, made out to someone?" Looked down at the form again. "Oh! Right. Sorry."

Brilliant. Seriously brilliant.

But, at the same time, I have to lower my hatred of her from the seething disdain I reserve for most women who are famous for being seen and their boobs, down to the general disdain I reserve for most of the human species. Why? Because, In addition to the retarded crap she did, she also did a couple things that made me say, "I don't think I could put up with you long enough to have a beer with you, but I could probably tolerate you enough to say hello if we worked in the say building & walked by each other."

To wit (Fun with lawyer phrases!) – She saw a post on PerezHilton.com that made fun of her arrival in the US. And, instead of putting some pouty, whiney letter on her website about how hard her life is & why is everyone so mean to her, she did her hair & makeup, threw on some fabulous shoes, and went to the coffee shop that Perez works out of to say hello. Then, instead of going off & bitching him out, she sat down & shot the shit with him for a while. She made fun of herself, even.

And, later in the show, she mused on what the hell the younger socialites are thinking when they go out without their knickers on. Which I can always agree with.

Am I going to go out of my way to watch Victoria Beckham preen like a twit every Thursday night? Oh, hell no. But, if I have nothing else to do at 9pm central time, I know I can turn to NBC and I will probably be hugely entertained by an idiot who doesn't know what baseball is. I might even get a peek of her brutally hot hubby.


Jeebus. I feel like I should offset that brainless fun with something that requires a brain. But, then I remember that I use most of my waking hours studying for the Missouri Bar Exam – Which is this coming Tuesday & Wednesday. Go 2-day exams! – and I don't feel so bad about it.

If you feel like you need to offset, here are a couple links to enjoy:

The New York Times
CNN
American MENSA
Colbert Nation
The Pajama Pundit

And, of course, it's nice to hear that the FAA has unclenched its asshole a little bit and now allows lighters to be taken on airplanes.

Love for everyone…. Except those bastards that think I need to take a fucking 12 ½ hour, 2-day exam in… wait for it… a hotel conference room in Jeff City.

Speaking of! Who's up for drinking next Wednesday night? Maybe DB's for karaoke? I'm gonna need to drink a lot and think as little as possible.